If you've never read a single book in the last decade then the first book you should read is Life Strategies by Dr. Phillip McGraw. It is a powerful tool for those wanting to change their lives. In Life Strategies Dr. Phil combines common sense with wit, humor and his years of professional training to deliver ten life laws that if followed is guaranteed to at the very least have you thinking differently about where you are in your life.
Life Strategies starts with the story of Oprah Winfrey being sued … during the course of the trial she was in denial (an epidemic that we as Americans are plagued with) but when she "Got Real" and faced the problem she was not only able to agree but to win a battle that was cooked on an uneven playing field. The lesson here pioneers his first life law … you either get it or you do not. When you face up to your problems and admit that you are where you are without the "Blindfolds" then you get it.
Dr. Phil describes how you create your own experience as life law number 2. Summed up you get what you give. All of what you bring to the table, how you engage people, how to think about things, how you feel about life, your thought patterns will create an experience that encourages positive results or not. Try having positive thoughts for one day …. Smile, do something nice for someone even someone who you do not like and what results is a positive experience and good feeling. I tried it … WOW … it works!
The third life law was mind blowing and in my opinion the MOST important. People do what works. Dr. Phil describes your payoff system. Of course it's different for everyone but it is at the core of your behavior patterns. If you first recognize and acknowledge your payoffs for ALL your destructive behaviors then you can begin the process of altering the payoff – NO Psychologist needed-you can do this if you stay committed.
The 4th life law deals with Acknowledging ALL the things in your life that are not working or leaving you feeling down and discouraged- once you acknowledge it you can change it. Put it on paper – a concrete reference point – then change it.
The 5th life law is simple … DO. Just get out and do things. Life rewards action. It's understood that you would DO those things that would bring you closer to your unique goals. DO – it works!
The 6th life law there is no reality only perception your take on things and events, the 7th law Life is managed not cured aka Life presents problems and challenges that's life, the 8th law We teach people how to treat us AKA stand up for yourself and demand that you are treated in a way that makes you feel good, the 9th law there is power in forgiveness Yes do not let negative past experiences with people keep you bitter it is SELF DEFEATING and goes against a happy fulfilling life! Life law # 10 you've embraced all the life laws you've identified the What, Who, How, When in your life so stand up and claim it. Life laws 6 through 10 must be done simultaneously and will overlap but once you've committed to laws 1 to 5 the rest will automatically follow. This book is a MUST read. You will not regret it!